I had kissed Dakota. Twice.
Like the day before, I threw open the apartment door, only to remember that Kimmy was at work tonight. Shit.
“No, this is fine,” I murmured to myself, like a sane person, walking around my apartment and trying to calm my racing heart.
“I can handle this,” I told myself, wrenching open the fridge door and staring into it like it would answer me. “It was one kiss. Two kisses, whatever, it was nothing. I’ve kissed almost a dozen people, some of them platonically, this isn’t anything, it could be anything, it doesn’t–” Fuck it, I was rambling to a refrigerator, the actual definition of sanity. Closing my eyes, I rested my head against the cool freezer door. The cold air was grounding, easing the low grade anxiety that was making me shake. I hated that, hated that everything made me vibrate like a damn chihuahua. Overwhelmed, weirdly still turned on, and a little confused, stood there and stared into space.
My phone vibrated and I jumped, suddenly realizing that I’d pretty much left my body for a minute there. I closed the fridge, deciding on heating up a can of soup instead. I didn’t really feel like cooking, considering all of my energy was presently being used to keep me standing and not crying.
I needed to call Emma. Excitement set my heart racing, I wanted– needed– to share this elation, this feeling of… of…
What the hell was I feeling, anyway?
My phone buzzed again, reminding me that I’d been neglecting it. I whipped it out of my pocket, my heart doing a weird little dance when I read Dakota’s name.
Now shush about that. Especially to Val.
Well then. What reason would he have to hide this from Val? It didn’t make sense, but if he wanted me to keep quiet, I would. Except to Emma and Kimmy, who were, honestly, following this adventure of mine more closely than Val. Or, for that matter, anyone else.
Frowning, I set my phone aside and started to make myself food. My eating habits were downright awful, and it reflected in my broken out skin and recent, rapid loss of weight. Sure, sometimes I brought my own lunch to work and ate “healthy,” sometimes I actually cooked a meal at home, sometimes I even ate breakfast before I left the house. Usually, however, my meals consisted of Taco Bell burritos, chips and popcorn, canned soup, and homemade fried rice. More often than not, I straight up forgot to eat.
I pulled up YouTube on my laptop, just letting a let’s-player talk in the background while I stared into the void and ate my soup. Like a real Classy Lady (™), I curled up on the couch with the bowl of soup in my hands. My phone went off again, Dakota’s name popping up on the screen.
Wanna have some fun tomorrow morning?
My soup nearly hit my lap. I managed to set it on the coffee table beside my laptop, not to mention swallowing what I’d already spooned into my mouth (which almost hadn’t happened either). “Have some fun,” I assumed, meant fulfilling all those flirtatious quips we’d been making. I could still hear him telling me he couldn’t wait to be between my legs. My face went red at the thought, heat still curling in my belly.
Before work. I have to take a friend to the airport, I’ll be going right past the college.
I remembered Kimmy at the last second before I sent him a yes. With damn good timing, because she walked in the door as I deleted the words in my text.
The giddiness came back full force, hitting me in the chest like bricks. “I kissed Dakota!”
Kimmy froze, her eyes wide, a smile breaking over her face. “Wow! Good for you!”
Wiggling in my seat, I beamed up at her. “Twice!” I got two thumbs up. “He wants to have some fun tomorrow.”
Aaaaaaaand judgement. I grinned at her. “I haven’t said yes yet… exactly.”
Kimmy snorted. “I’ll be gone by ten, Taylor’s coming to get me and we’re going mall hopping tomorrow. So if you want your boy to come shag you, by all means.”
As I typed my answer, I couldn’t stop laughing.
My roommate said she was out of here by ten.
See you at ten, then.
I shrieked, excitement back in full force and then some.
“Getting the D tomorrow, love?” Kimmy was smirking at me as she changed out of her work uniform.
“Oh man I sure hope so,” I said, yanking open my dresser drawer. “Help me pick out cute underwear.”
“The teal matching set. You really like that bra, and the panties are lacy and cute but don’t scream ‘I planned to have you rip my clothes off,’ so it’s a win-win.”
I put my hand over my heart and glanced back at her. “You’re a genius, what would I do without you?”
Kimmy just grinned toothily at me. I pulled out the suggested set, then tracked down my jean shorts and a tee shirt. On the off hand chance “having fun” didn’t actually mean having Dakota between my legs, I didn’t want to look like I was expecting it, planning for it, secretly praying for it.
Oh man, I was hooked, and I knew it.
Kimmy, bless her, took one of the fastest showers in history. As she whirled out, her towel secured around her, she kissed my cheek. “You’ll have plenty of hot water, babe. Shave everywhere.”
I burst out cackling. “Not everywhere, but I will shave most places.” Thank you, Kimmy.”
She winked at me as I closed the door.